Goal: Gaining more for the Baby

When I first met my nurse, she told me that my goal in the next few months is to gain 28 lbs, ultimately at the weight of 132 at the end of my pregnancy.

I started at about 104, give or take (at 4 weeks).

Now, I'm almost 19 weeks but only 110 lbs. I've never weighted more than 115 in my life and that was during college with bad eating habits, junk food, binge eating, weird sleep pattern. How am I supposed to gain 22 more pounds? Mathematically, it'd mean at least 1 lb per week. With healthy eating habits of course. But that's almost double the effort.

My daily breakfast mainly consists of a child-sized cup of fruits with at least two varieties: strawberries, plums, berries or pears, always one banana a day at 5x per week, and a small bowl of cereal that's not always the best selection but always labeled with "whole grain" - whether it's truly made with whole grain or not that's an entirely different research.

Lunch is a toss up...but mainly consists of some form of grain: rice (white), pasta, rice (white)...with leftovers from the night before.

Dinner is similar to lunch but almost always with meat. Pregnancy seems to beckon me towards red meat, particularly ground beef or steak. I used to consume more chicken, but my cravings for these lean meat creatures have been rather lacking. Perhaps my body is telling me I lack iron and should consume more red meat?? I definitely know lean white meat is recommended over red.

Two things I know for sure that I'm not getting enough of are vegetables and exercise! I wish I was more inclined to graze the green fields of nutrients, but can I say I'm too lazy, I mean -- tired, to do so? My baby is not getting enough of spinach, broccoli, romaines, etc. and it's my fault. Perhaps it's time to take a long walk to the nearest Souplantation again (it's hubby new favorite place)? That is, if I'm up for a 40 mile walk !

It's growing, slowly but surely.

[New direction in life since last we spoke]

It's growing, I think. That amazing bump, slowly but surely. I hope.

In my 13th week now, going on 14th in two days. And, the feeling that there's life growing inside of me is still oddly wonderful. Hearing another heartbeat that isn't mine inside of my body is awe-inspiring. That God has created a new breathing life.

I feel genuinely happy for friends and family who tell me they are expecting but it's not until you are on the same boat that you truly understand the depth of happiness & reality of the situation; it rocks you a certain way that you've never felt before.

I'm trying not to worry too much albeit my worry habits. I dream dreams that I shouldn't be dreaming at times as if I'm almost afraid of something. Perhaps it's just jitters, or a first-time mom-to-be thing. Just need to breathe, be healthy for the wee one and pray that God will look over him/her.

There's something about taking pictures....

.......with a cellphone.

It's quick, it's simple and the quality isn't so bad either, even when it is, it's almost kind of artsy.




But sometimes one can't grab it fast enough and the lag time between loading and clicking can be a little annoying when you need to catch those precious moments. But all in all, it's definitely a medium that shouldn't be avoided even when it's just casual fun.


Picture: Molecule running around on my messy desk.

It's been awhile

since coming back to this world of blogging. never thought i would be here again, writing something that is not related to work, so strange to write, type and think. words do not flow out as easily as they used to. but here again, i aim to reinvent the muse that left me behind three years ago in the cloud of dust and memories.

hoping one day that touch of youthful inspiration will resurface once again in my presence.

picture: a hazy memory of Florence during sunset